It’s Okay to Ask for Help

Ahhh.  What is it about the end of the year that suddenly makes everything seem insane?

The mad rush to get everything done…and I mean everything.
From projects and deadlines at work to the rushed shopping trip to the rushed grocery store visit for the frantic rush of preparing a holiday meal.

What exactly is that all about?

We all do it year after year.  Okay, maybe not everyone, but a whole lot of us.  We just do it.  
Do we ever stop and ask ourselves WHY we are doing it?

Who is that for?  All that rushing.  All that frantic rushing around.
The pressure.
The stress.
The “just trying to get through the holidays” comments.

I don’t know about  you, but Christmas is my favorite time of year.  I love the lights everywhere.  The music. The way people seem nicer.  I love celebrating Jesus.  God literally gave us his son, to save us.  To live the perfect sin-less life that we couldn’t live…the one we were not capable of living.  And then he died for us.  He paid for our sins so that we can live forever with God, his father.  That’s something to celebrate.  I honestly can’t think of anything more to celebrate than that.

Except for each other.
You and me.  Your family.  Your friends.  Your loved ones.
That’s what this is all about.  

Do you ever catch yourself trying to do everything on your own?
Are you wearing a big red cape with a Superman or Superwoman “S” on it?
Are you exhausted?  Stressed out?  Pissed off?  Frustrated?
Are you just trying to “get through the holidays” so you can “start over” in 2012?

I want you to stop.  Trust me, I have to say this to myself sometimes too.
Just stop.

Someone very close to me lost a loved one recently to suicide.

I’ve had a difficult time writing about food since that happened.  All I could think about was life and living it.

I just want to take this time to say that it is okay to ask for help.
It’s okay to say, I need help. 
I’m unhappy.
I’m sad and depressed.
I hate my life.
It’s okay to say those things outloud to someone.
Trust me, the people who love you – they WANT you to tell them how you feel.
They can help you and if they can’t for some reason, they can always find someone who can.





God created us out of love.  We were created because God loves us.  We are here to enjoy this life.  Love one another.  Treat each other as we would want to be treated.  Love each other as God loves us.

We are not here to stress and worry.  We are not here to put insane expectations on our lives and ourselves and then beat ourselves up when we crack under the self imposed pressure.
We are not here to make piles of money and drive expensive cars and judge each other based on material things.
Sure, having nice things is nice, and enjoyable, but that’s not what life is about.

Getting 30 deals signed at work between now and January 1st isn’t what life is about.
Rushing through the store and camping out in lines to get some popular toy isn’t what life is about.  Wouldn’t it be a better idea to spend that time home with your family?
Frantically stressing in a kitchen for 9 hours to prepare some elaborate meal and then being so exhausted that you don’t even enjoy eating it, and let’s not even mention all the dishes…that’s not what life is about either.

Life is about you and me.
It’s about your family.  Your friends.  Your loved ones.  Your neighbor who needs help carrying her grocery bags inside.
The man who needs help across the street.
Your children who want to spend Christmas day with their Mom, not missing their Mom because she’s in the kitchen all day.  Or missing their Dad because he’s been at the store for 6 hours.
Life is about asking each other How Are You?  No really, how ARE you?
What is happening in your life?
Life is about being there for each other.

If you are having a difficult time in any area of your life, find someone to talk to.  A family member, a friend…anyone.  Stop into your church and talk to your Pastor or Worship Leader.  

Pray.  Have faith.  Have hope.

If you want to change something in your life, know that you CAN change it!   You can make a decision at any moment to change your life.  Change your circumstance.

If you feel like the weight of the world is on your shoulders, stop and take off that dang Superman cape.

You’re human.
God never asked us to wear any cape.  He asked us to love one another.

Are you reaching out to others this holiday season?
Do you know what your children are fretting about?
Do you know what your sister is stressed out about?  Or your cousin?  Or your best friend?
Do you ask them?

It upsets me so much to know that we live in a world where someone would feel there was no option left other than to leave this world on their own accord.

It tears my heart apart to think about it.

This Holiday Season, I only want one thing from all of you.  Just one thing.

Spend time with your family.
Real time.
Ask them what’s on their mind lately.
Ask them how they are doing.
Show them the kind of love that you wish to be shown.
Forget about the presents, the fancy dinner, the pressure at work, the hustle and bustle.
Press the pause button on your routine…it’s so easy for us to get caught up in it and forget about each other.


If you are in distress, if you are hurting, if you  are sad and depressed, lonely, and in a place that is dark, please reach out to someone.  Talk to someone.  Anyone.

If you can’t find someone to talk to, or you don’t feel comfortable reaching out to family, call this number:1-800-273-8255 and visit this website

Someone will answer your call and be there to talk to you.  

God loves you so much that there aren’t enough words to express it.  It’s true.  If I searched a thesaurus to find the words to express God’s love for you, I would come up short.  Remarkably short.

So this holiday season, when we gather with family and friends, let’s do it the way we were meant to do it.

Make a nice meal that is doable, stressfree, and doesn’t leave you pulling your hair out in the kitchen.
Skip the long lines at the stores.  Try shopping online and have some items delivered to your home.  You get what you want, plus quality time with your family.
The best gift  you can give to anyone is the gift of yourself.
God created you like no other.
Perfectly imperfect…just like the rest of us.
Share YOU with the world, with your family and friends.
Slow it down.
Let’s not forget why we are here.  Let’s not forget what this is all about.



PS – this song started playing in my car driving home from work tonight and it made me cry.  It was one of those release-everything-cry-in-the-car moments, but it just seemed kinda perfect.

Lovely comments!

  1. This is such a beautiful post. It brought tears to my eyes with it’s pure and raw truth and honesty. Someone at my boyfriend’s work committed suicide this week much to everyone’s shock. I think this message is so important for many to hear especially around this time of year. Thank you for sharing!

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